Saturday, March 22, 2008

40 weeks, 3 days: still here

We're still pregnant.

I have been telling myself for weeks that I shouldn't expect to have this baby on my due date, but nevertheless, that date stuck in my brain like a glittery promise.

It's like Christmas in Japan. We were living in Kyoto during the holidays a couple years ago, and since they don't bother with Thanksgiving, the Christmas cheer started building right after Halloween. There were all the familiar trappings -- piped-in jingles over loudspeakers, tinsel decorations, Santa in all his cheeky glory -- it was infectious enough that I couldn't help but get a little giddy about it. And then Christmas Day itself was a total letdown. Nothing happened at all. I think there was a marathon in our neighborhood.

So it is with due dates that come and go. Except this holiday is gonna come, dammit.

Last night the full moon rose like a tangerine over the San Diego skyline, and I willed the baby to be pulled like the tide, down and out of me... It would have been so poetic and fitting, as we're sure he was conceived on a full moon, too. I felt a distinctly painful contraction around 7pm, but then just more Braxton-Hicks. I'm told that these are not without their function, and I should not be discouraged. I keep saying, I'm ready! J keeps saying: It's not up to you.

I know he's right. I'm not even technically late. But it doesn't stop me from wishing and scheming and hoping...




Rachel said...

Hang in there Robin! It's so hard to wait for this. Just get as much rest and sleep as you can while you still can.:)

*britt* said...

go robin, go! come baby, come!